"Old Timer"

"Old Timer"

 I just saw another "Health Nut" article saying as to how your 50's are the new late 30's. What a load of damp shit. Who the fuck do they think they're kidding. My 50's were a fucking nightmare of body damage, and worn out parts.

However being over 60 is bleeping paradise. For starts you can't remember shit you don't care about bleep. Sex is mercifully a distant bad memory. 

People give a seat where ever ya are. Relatives are always doing nice crap for ya, and calling to see if you're still alive. Heck an old pal just called this morning. Wanted to know if I wanted some home made apple pie.

That stuff could kill me these daze so of course I said "yeah as many as ya got!"

Though I'm always sick as hell depressed pissed off, and generally annoyed, and disappointed I'm enjoying the hell out of my Golden Retirement Nightmare.

My biggest problems are remembering which meds to take, and when. That, and suddenly dropping dead.

Oh year I think them UFO saucer guys have stopped abducting me. 

Yeah I've had an ongoing problem with them bastards for a while. I remember telling the story on the air as to how my radio station manager gave me an emergency sick day.

This because I was have scary flashbacks of of some of my weirder abduction episodes...ya had to be there. 

The point is I worked at maybe the only place on Earth when your boss would give you a UFO sick day.

I'm looking forward to my 70's, and 3-D TV!

Otherwise I'm fine.


Stay Tuned.