Wednesday, September 28, 2016

"Radio Daze"

Tho' retired now this old post sums up my decades in that pointless thankless unkind business. I should have joined the fucking Navy.


It's hard to do a radio show. It's even harder to do a good one. So what's it like to do "Live Radio?" That's a disappearing form of broadcast where it's just you, and your guts in front of the mic, and nothing else.

 Well like someone said once, 

"...any damned fool can get himself in front of a camera or mic, and make a damned fool of himself.

Ain't that the truth.

So here it is. 

Imagine you're all alone on a stage with the population of a town watching, and listening. You're juggling 20 or 30 heavy sharp object to off key out of tune music.

Btw the stage you're on is on hydraulic lifts so is rocking like a boat in rough seas. That, and while juggling you're singing the funnier  songs from various "Gilbert, and Sullivan" comic operettas.

Btw you're nauseous have a killer headache tunnel vision, and your throat is shredded from the flu.

From time to time during your performance you give heartfelt commentaries hilarious satires, and intimate stories from your life concerning love sex life death betrayal, and that pain in your side that just won't go away.

In the middle of all this you take calls from extremely stupid, and hostile people who may or may not have been paying attention to anything you've been doing.

All the while the stage manager,..who hates you has sabotaged the lighting, and all the mics.

You make very little money, and the management thinks you don't deserve even does some of the audience. 

The stage manager distrusts all the live performers because he can't control everything they do...bad for business that. He wants to replace them all with Dog Acts...more dependable.

Anyway after the tattered curtain goes down you get harassed  by your political enemies among the staff, and union, your pay check is short, some bastard has stolen stuff out'a your locker.

There's a waiting phone call from your landlord, and oh yeah then you get handed a note from the stage manager that sez your next two performances are cancelled. 

Seems he's found a dog, and, and a flea circus to replace you.

Ah, but you never give up because the gawd-damned fucking show must frigging go the fuck on!

Hope this explains the Biz for ya. Peace.

Stay tuned.

"I Always Wanted to be a Geisha"

As I've mentioned on various of my pages current, and nuked. My Grandma used to dress me up in girlie stuff. She especially liked stuffing her old bonnet from the 1920's on my head.

Well back in her day boys, and girls dressed the same so she didn't think it weird to do me up. My Dad was a tad freaked out, and eventually put a stop to it, but for a few years my Granny, and I explored junior cross dressing.

Basically yeah Grandma was trying to turn me into a transvestite. Today she'd be arrested, and shot. What with everything being illegal now. Back then however people had Freedom to do weird stuff...imagine that.

Anyway I guess among other things this is why as a kid I wanted to be a Nun, Nurse, Cowgirl, Ballerina, and yeah a Geisha.

The only drag I'm into these days is my eventual intention to get a re-enactors Civil War Calvary uniform.  The 9th U.S. Colored Regiment. I'm really specific in my fantasies.

Still if I was a kid, and still had my girlish figure I imagine I would do the Geisha thing. My Dad would'a had kittens, but Grandma would have loved it.

Ain't life interesting.



CONSPIRACY theorists have finally been convinced there is no secret society running the country because no-one could possibly believe any of this was orchestrated.

Since the dawn of the internet, bedroom-based conspiracy theorists have thought society was controlled by a shadowy ‘Illuminati’ who somehow have the manpower to run everything.
Tom Logan, from Stevenage, said: “If they are running it then someone needs to be sacked.

“Or sacrificed, if that’s what they do.”

Racist, Norman Steele added, “I used to think the Jews were running everything. But they seem pretty organized, so I can’t imagine they’d be behind this mess.”

Professor Henry Brubaker, from the Institute for Studies, added: “When you look at the current state of affairs, it’s pretty clear who is running it.

“The French.”


The above describes my feelings exactly. No self respecting Mad Rulers of the World, and Cosmos would be running a demented disaster like what we've got.

I mean if there really 'were' a bunch of guys wearing funny hats weird robes chanting shit, and ruling the world from a bunker somewhere. Things might actually be a lot better.

Taken from or if you will brazenly stolen from:

Stay Tuned.

"More Bad News"

We're killer Apes that pay income tax, and wear hats. However yes we have a spark...a tiny spark of something better, and brighter. Time we need time. Evolution is so slow. The gene that some few have that dampens aggression, and opens new channels of intelligence needs time.

My lay person's estimate is 20 to 50 thousands years before it's a given common trait. The problem is that such few that have it are so often either killed outright in childhood for being different or pushed aside in mating competition.

This is why the kind gentle ones are so rare.

As for those many thousands of years needed...we don't have it. That ecological "Tipping Point" is not in the future, but the past. Perhaps 50 to 100 years past. Maybe slightly longer. Some in the field are beginning to realize this. Right now it's being dismissed. But then back in the 1990's they said what's happening now these disasters wouldn't occur till mid-century or later.

Get the drift? ...we're fucked.

Mind you Earth 'will' abide. Heck in it's early history it survived a hit by an object the size of Mars. So we're no threat. Earth will just right itself without us. In 30 million years or so you'd never know we were ever here.

As for them 30 Million years. The scars humans will leave behind on the earth, quarries tunnels city traces landfills will be gone mostly by then.

Oh sure if you knew what you were looking for you might find a ceramic doodad or two.  Maybe a tunnel or urban trace here, and there.

Also though the half-life of most of the radio-active materials we fooled around with will have cooled off. There are some artificial exotic radiated materials we made with half-lives that border the hundred million mark.

If you were an Exo-Geologist from another star system say 60,000,000 years from now. That, and your dig was in the neighborhood of a former Laurence Livermore site. You'd be surprised, and intrigued at the radiation readings you were getting.

The source is clearly artificial, and has been in this deposit for tens of millions of years. Like the Voyager probes sailing out to the stars this find would say there was an ancient intelligent species that once lived on this world.

'That' at long last would be our "First Contact".

Stay Tuned.

"Our Better Angels"

Well in 2010 more non-white babies were born in this Republic than white ones. This shouldn't matter I mean we're all just folks. However we know it does which is why some whites are going nuts. Trump, and wanting their country back, and all.

Well I'll say this.

In the life-time of people living today whites in America will be an ethnic minority. That is just a mathematical fact. However don't worry. Really don't. Because we'll be more just, and kinder to you than you 'ever' were to us.

That's the chill.

Stay Tuned.

"Dancing in my Dreams"


A brief though hard rain blew through town late this afternoon. Winds tossed the trees back, and forth. Leaves filled the air. All that Wizard of OZ stuff on steroids.

Later that evening I went out for a walk on the Parkway. Eastern Parkway in fact. This street began as a deer trail. Then in colonial times a horse track for 200 years or so.

When they put in the subway lines in the late 19th early 20th centuries it became a four lane highway. With parkland on either side. Here is where I played as a child.

Time, and circumstance have brought me back to where I began.

So many changes. I recall all the Whites fleeing to their 'Burbs when Coloreds, and Hispanics started to come in. Now their grandchildren are here. Back from their strange exile in the land of Bar-B-Q pits, and segregated pools.

They're welcome as all are here.

Walking tonight along the Parkway I heard the symphony of languages that so marks this Emerald City. Haitian creole French Russian varieties of Spanish Romanian Mandarin various sorts of English,...I think I even heard a few bars of Standard English in the Symphony's  adagio.

I couldn't live anywhere else.

I sensed autumn. Just a very slight aroma. The fall scent was in the air after the storm. It was warm, and humid yes, but the breeze had an edge of coolness about. In the same way you sense spring in very late winter...a cold breeze yet with a faint warm edge.

The Sun, and Moon have chased each other through the seasons. We have lived another summer, and now prepare for short days cold nights, and the turning of the leaves.

A Wonder.

Stay tuned.

"Time Goes By"

This very well may be me in one of my brief earlier lives. I say "brief" because I don't think I lived into old age in any of the others. This may be the first time for that.

Which is why everything now is such a surprise.

Well here I am at the very start of this time around. I recall so well how so much seemed familiar. I was so sure I'd seen certain things before. This I suppose because in the early 1950's so much of 19th century even traces of 18th century New York was still apparent.

Life after life.

This can't be proven scientifically. It's all so subjective. I hope it stays that way. We need the mysterious. Things that are not quite there yet there.

Like touching an Angel's wings.

It's said that they are just this side of solid. Like running your hands through warm air. There, but not quite.

As it should be.

Stay Tuned.

"I'm All Packed, and Waiting!",...Love Sidney

It is my most sincere Hope that Peter Pan will get this message via sub-space in 1959. That he'll get to my prison...aka "Home" in that time period, and rescue me from the next near 60 years of hell, and assorted annoying bullshit called "Life". (There's 1959 me below.)

"Yes I know all about the World of Men with their Greed Wars Cruelty, and Madness. You exterminate whole peoples you murder babies children you poison the land the seas the skies. Yes I know your world well. Which is why I rescue as many of your little ones as I can"

Stay Tuned.

"A Dream"

I had another surreal dream last night. These times seem to engender them.

The seas had risen. Then froze. Polar bears swam, and played in the ice bound city streets. The stars were bright the moon was close so close.

I swam with Polar Bears.

I swam with these bears, and their cubs. This beneath the drowned streets. I saw cars parked where they were left,...buses. All under a new frozen sea.

I sat on an ice flow, and watched as a giant moon rose above skyscrapers that jutted above this new Arctic sea.

All this on a now slowly healing Earth.

Stay Tuned.